the irrational girl's guide to actually relaxing

finding time to relax can be really tough, but it's absolutely necessary for your sanity.  

here are my tips for all of us busy gals who need to fit a little more down time into our lives.

{this may work for boys too, but i have not confirmed this seeing as how i'm a girl and all.}

the irrational girl's guide to actually relaxing:

1. collect any to-do lists you've created recently and hide them {stuffing
them in the back of the freezer or down the shower drain are good places}.

2. if you have kids, set them outside in a small, fenced-in area with a locked gate. 

provide protective padding, water, and shade, then go back inside where it's quiet.

3. do a quick 5 minute cleanse of your environment by packing everything into large trashbags then piling them into a closet or under the bed {you can go through them later}. include things around the house that you think are really ugly, but which your partner/roommate loves {you don't need to deal with ugly things when you're trying to relax}.

4. have multiple bags of your favorite chips {all natural cheetos anyone?} 

and mix up a family size box of annie's mac n cheese.  eat ALL of this in one sitting.

5. consider pulling out your single girl sweats with the worn-out
 elastic {perfect for gorging yourself on cheese-related products}.

6. ignore your phone. if it keeps beeping at you, chuck it as hard as you can into 

the forest, or if you're a city gal like me, drop it into a large pot of boiling water.

7. watch whatever you want, read whatever you want, dance as spastically as you want, sing as 

loudly and as out of tune as you want, and hold multiple out-loud conversations with
yourself {you don't even have to claim that you're talking to the cat}.

8. barricade the door with several extremely heavy objects so when your
partner/roommate comes home they won't be able to get in and judge you.

9. when you're finished with your relaxation time, don't forget to hide the evidence of empty cheetos bags and x-large sweat pants {fyi - rice cookers and covered litterboxes are some other good hiding spots}.

10. remove barricades, bring in your children {see? they were fine}, and go about your business as usual. 

viola!

yes, you are welcome! 

{and when in doubt, ask yourself, WWTFD?}

i'm sure you all have a new found sense of appreciation for the sort of irrational behavior the mister has to deal with on a daily basis living with me.  luckily i have the whole cute-as-a-button-puppy-dog-eyes down like a pro.